Member-only story
What I Don’t Miss (While in Self-Isolation)
Realising that there’s never a phone charger when you need one
Pigeons. Or for that matter, anything that can flap wings and shit on my head
Going shopping when you have nothing to buy and ending up with five giant bags you can’t even remember what’s inside
Going shopping because there’s something you desperately need, but it turns out you can’t find it anywhere because of the wrong colour, the wrong size or the wrong shopping assistant, and go back home empty-handed
Getting mugged on the street
Walking the dog and realising you’ve forgotten the poo bag
Starbucks misspelling your name so often until you become a monosyllabic “Bill” or “Jess” and find out that surprisingly they can also spell that wrong
Going to IKEA just for a browse. Then you zig-zag through the path drawn on the floor and get tons of ideas, picturing a more glamorous living room, a more functional bathroom, and you end up grabbing of non-characteristic Swedish food and walk away with an empty bag
Getting accidentally groped on public transport
Getting groped on purpose on public transport
Asking bus drivers if there’s room for your buggy, but they apologise and drive away…